A Bit About Me
My name is Yeshua Adonai, and my path has been one of transformation—woven with deep initiations, profound loss, and an unshakable devotion to the truth of the human spirit. I am a guide, a mentor, and a fellow traveler, dedicated to supporting others as they navigate the thresholds of healing, awakening, and self-discovery. My life is not defined by accolades or external accomplishments, but by the trials I have overcome—the inner battles that have forged in me a lasting sense of peace, joy, and love that no external force can take away.
“True healing is not about escaping pain, but about learning to walk with it until it transforms into wisdom.”
My path began in service, first as a U.S. Marine, then as a diplomat with the U.S. Department of State. I have walked through war, the corridors of power, and the depths of my own suffering. PTSD, treatment-resistant depression, and severe anxiety became the adversaries I faced, pushing me toward the edge of existence. The unraveling of my life did not stop there—divorce, betrayal, bankruptcy, homelessness—each moment stripping me of identity, forcing me to confront what remains when everything is lost.
For years, I carried shame like a weight around my neck. I blamed the world, my past, the broken systems, and the people who had betrayed me. I resented my upbringing in a fanatical, fundamentalist Christian household that taught me fear instead of love. I raged at the suffering I saw, at the senseless wars I had participated in, at the moral compass that once guided me but now lay shattered. The world outside was broken, but I came to realize that the brokenness I saw was also inside me. And that was the first lesson: healing does not begin with fixing the world, it begins with facing ourselves.
“Liberation is not about changing the world—it is about transforming our relationship with it.”
It was in the depths of these experiences that I discovered something profound: true liberation does not come from changing our circumstances but from transforming our relationship with them. The greatest accomplishment of my life has not been a title or position but the choice, again and again, to meet myself fully, to take radical responsibility for my growth, and to open my heart even in the face of devastation. I stopped seeking someone to blame and instead sought to understand. I stopped running from my pain and instead sat with it, listened to it, let it burn away the illusions I had once clung to.
In 2008, I experienced a profound spiritual awakening. This was not a concept, not an idea, but a direct and undeniable experience of truth. Out-of-body experiences, expanded perception, and an overwhelming encounter with love shattered the way I had seen the world. Yet awakening does not erase pain; it illuminates it. I saw the wounds that still festered within me—the fears, the guilt, the buried grief. For years, I had been tormented by an existential crisis, struggling to find my purpose, to live in integrity, to offer my gifts in a way that mattered. The suffering of the world sickened me, and I felt lost, trapped between the impulse to give everything and the despair that no effort would ever be enough.
“Purpose is not given; it is cultivated. Integrity is not an aspiration; it is a daily practice.”
My work is deeply influenced by the teachings of Paramahansa Yogananda, Thích Nhất Hạnh, and the Fourth Way of Gurdjieff, as well as wisdom traditions that have carried the sacred for millennia. I have spent time in monastic communities, engaged in long periods of solitary retreat, and immersed myself in nature to meet the wildness within myself.
I am now in the process of formalizing my work at the highest academic level as a potential candidate for Harvard Divinity School, where I will focus on Psychedelic Chaplaincy. My mission is to integrate psychedelic wisdom, ritual practice, and pastoral care in a way that creates ethical, structured, and accessible paths to healing for individuals and communities. I see my work as bridging the mystical and the practical, offering both direct experience and structured frameworks to help people integrate expanded states of consciousness into their everyday lives.
“Healing is not an event—it is a lifelong relationship with the unknown.”
Since 2013, I have actively engaged in psychedelic practice, both personally and in apprenticeship. I have participated in nearly a hundred guided experiences, deepening my understanding through direct immersion, mentorship, and study. Since 2022, I have served as a full-time psychedelic guide, facilitating over a few hundred ceremonies with psilocybin and MDMA.
I have studied with and served under the guidance of indigenous wisdom keepers from the Shipibo, Mazatec, Andean, and other traditional healing lineages, honoring the depth of their ancestral teachings and medicine practices. These traditions have profoundly influenced my understanding of psychedelic healing, teaching me not just about the medicines themselves, but about the ceremonial reverence, ethical responsibility, and sacred reciprocity necessary to hold these spaces with integrity.
In addition to my apprenticeship in traditional settings, I have also trained with practitioners working in clinical and therapeutic frameworks for psychedelic-assisted therapy. This has allowed me to bridge the worlds of ancestral medicine and modern science, ensuring that the work I facilitate is grounded in both ancient wisdom and contemporary research-backed methodologies.
My work as a facilitator is not about creating experiences but about guiding the process of integration—helping others take what they receive in expanded states and root it into the structure of their lives.
I have worked with visionary leaders, veterans, parents, artists, and seekers from all walks of life. I believe that the true test of healing is not in how we feel during the peak of an experience, but in how we live our lives when we return. This is why my approach includes deep preparation and long-term integration, ensuring that what is opened does not fade but becomes an embodied transformation.
Beyond my work with psychedelics, I am committed to advocating for policy reform and ethical facilitation practices, working with national organizations to create responsible, accessible frameworks for entheogenic medicine. I am also actively involved in mentoring new facilitators, ensuring that this work is passed on with the integrity and reverence it deserves.
“Love is not something we seek—it is something we become.”
If you’d like to explore my daily reflections, teachings, and insights, I invite you to follow me on Instagram. I share wisdom on psychedelic integration, self-inquiry, spiritual awakening, somatic healing, and the continuous journey of transformation—woven with personal stories, practical guidance, and reflections on what it means to live a fully embodied and heart-centered life.
Instagram: @yeshuaadonai.
